hacking the hot bar with leaves

The Whole Foods Hot Bar, although ostentatiously overpriced and the representation of a pretentious and classist cafeteria buffet, will always hold a very special place in my heart. I know all about the Whole Foods, “whole paycheck” jokes and how ridiculously overpriced it is. But no matter how bourgeoisie and white af it is, I cannot stay away. It’s like the fratty pre-law guys I … Continue reading hacking the hot bar with leaves

food and makeup, the strangest collaboration

There have been some very strange collaborations of this century. Lil Nas X and RM? Cheetos and bagels with cream cheese (OK this one gives me Midwest middle school vibes)? Elon Musk and Grimes? Man oh man the list goes on. However, something that I have always found extremely weird is the constant combination of makeup and food. Listen, we’re not kids walking through Kohl’s … Continue reading food and makeup, the strangest collaboration

concealer that covers up almost all your problems

I think we as a society have grown accustomed to covering things up. The Jeffrey Epstein debacle that happened over the weekend is a prime example of that. I will leave this to the experts, as I am not one, but rather a Shonda Rhimes enthusiast and Reddit conspiracy theory thread reader, but come on…..24/7 suicide watch and he’s gone? Tricky tricky. This scandal got … Continue reading concealer that covers up almost all your problems

is healthy candy an oxymoron

The keto diet has become wildly popular in recent years. It’s mostly because people love shortcuts and fatty dairy products, and the keto diet encompasses both. People will do absolutely anything to cut corners, people will also do absolutely anything an excuse to eat copious amounts of cheese and butter. Trust me, I’m lactose intolerant and you’ll still see me chowing down on some jalapeño … Continue reading is healthy candy an oxymoron

take me to milk bar not red lobster

Everyone has different thoughts when it comes to birthday cake. It’s like the perfect man—if you ask different women, they’ll come up with radically different imaginations as to what the perfect man is like. My perfect man is a tall, handsome, intelligent, charming and witty man who looks like a cross between Childish Gambino and Henry Golding. He has secret tattoos, is a philanthropist, loves … Continue reading take me to milk bar not red lobster

bb cream and its whole complex

BB creams became hella popular like a decade ago. It actually annoys me, because that abbreviation has literally like ten meanings. Blemish balm, blemish base, beblesh balm, beauty balm….. the list goes on. We all know that it is, and that it has a total complex. I’m a straight shooter, and let’s all be honest, is BB cream (not the OG Korean version, but the … Continue reading bb cream and its whole complex