the only sparkling water we respect

I love sparkling water. I know it’s been exhausted to the point where we’re spiking it (just you wait, I called it, CBD sparkling water is just a sip away), and I know it’s slowly emerging to dethrone pumpkin spice lattes as the ultimate symbol of a basic bitch, but there’s just something about it.

Maybe it’s because the bubbles make me feel bougie, or that the cans are smaller and slimmer than a typical soda can, or maybe it’s because my taste buds have been annihilated by the carbonic acid. But this lightly fruity hairspray flavored beverage has me fallen head over heels.

My all-time favorite, and forever queen is San Pellegrino Essenza. See? Normal essence wasn’t good enough for them, so they had to find ESSENZA. This sparkling mineral water is refreshing, has a nice kick from the minerals and carbonation, and just tastes like you’re vacationing in Venice even though we all know the closest you’ve gotten is microwaving Olive Garden leftovers and eating them in your cubicle.

It’s okay though…..because you have San Pellegrino.

It’s so elite that it has a foil covering the opening to protect itself from plebes.

Trust me. Ever since I took my first sip of La Croix (pronounced La Croy, not Lwwwuaaaah Quiioiiiiaaaaa like the jerks in your office), I’ve been a fiend. From La Croix to Perrier to Bubly and Spindrift, I am a connoisseur. Trust me, we all know San Pellegrino has got them beat.

ps my favorite flavor is the lemon. It’s so classic that it can’t be beat.

2 thoughts on “the only sparkling water we respect

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